Healing my brokenness

I AM STRONG I AM A LOVER I AM A NURTURER I AM A FIGHTER I AM LIFE I AM LOVE I FALL SHORT AT TIMES I MAKE MISTAKES I WILL FAIL AT TIMES I WILL NOT QUIT I WILL BEND BUT... I WILL NOT BREAK!

As I reflect on the last year of my life I began to realize just how strong Tajai really is. Year 32 was a year full of trials and tribulations.... I had a house fire 6/28/17, hysterectomy due to fibroids on 6/30/17, kidney stone removal and temporary stent placed on 7/31/17, major relocation halfway across the country after living in a hotel for 31 days because we lost our home after the fire, and as soon as things started to turn around for my family boom 👊 my gallbladder starts acting up and I had to have it removed 6/18/18....yes I've experienced depression, anxiety, doubt, hopelessness, and a variety of other emotions throughout all of this, but I'm still standing strong ready to fight another day! While I was dealing with all of that I still had to be wife, mom, granddaughter, friend, and nurse...some days were definitely harder than others, but I made it!!! I pray that my story can be a motivation to others...no matter what obstacles life throws your way r...

Depression is ugly. I hate it, but unfortunately it's been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. The advantage of being diagnose with depression is that I'm more aware of my moods and can tell when it's coming; most of the time. The disadvantage is that it's getting old and when it does happen to sneak up on me it hits hard! I no longer feel like I want to hurt myself and I do know that these negative feelings will pass, but being depressed still sucks. No matter how positive I've tried to think or act today this storm cloud that's hanging over me just keeps growing and growing 😔 Ultimately all I can do is keeping pushing forward and trust that God will see me through this!!!

As I've worked on repairing myself over the past few months I've decided to use materials that are not easily broken so that the new and improved me would be even more indestructible! Realizing that the devil continuously attacks me because he wants to prove to God that his loyal soldiers can be pushed to a point of brokenness I must make sure that I'm prepared for these attacks! I try my best to keep my armor handy because I never know when a war will break loose. I have to get back to reading my Bible daily and going to church on my Sunday's off because those are essential to keeping me spiritually strong 💪 ! I'm writing this to say that I don't expect to live in a world where challenges don't come because perfection doesn't exist. I just want to be in a place where I'm prepared to face life's challenges. I want my children to be prepared for the different obstacles they will face and I'm going to do everything within my power ...