And I Live
This week challenged me down to my core ...for the first time in a while I dealt with suicidal thoughts and felt that my family would be better off without me, but God used my love and dedication to my children to save me! My ultimate goal as a mother has been to provide my children with a biological mother who is a positive presence in their lives because I did not have the constant presence of my biological mother until I was sixteen years old and the sixteen years that my biological mother has been present have not been the easiest to say the least. Killing myself would permanently destroy my goal and create a future for my children that I have dreaded way before I was even pregnant with my son....having to grow up in this cold world motherless! Absolutely not at my own hands! The idea of me taking myself from them because "life is too hard" is selfish and the unconditional love I have for my children is selfless , so something wasn't adding up. I needed t